If it's meant to be...

On a whim this morning I turned yesterday's painting on its side, and look what I discovered: it's another shoreline painting! Who knew!

I really loved it in its vertical state: of all the work I've done since the lockdown began the only other one that comes close to pleasing me as much is Peace like a River:


But when I flipped yesterday's painting on its side, there was this sense of rightness that settled in, kind of an aha/epiphany moment, that this is what I'm meant to be doing.

Now granted -- a lot of the intention (there's that word again) of this period of daily experimentation was to figure out what exactly is my style: I've gotten feedback before that people kind of what to know what to expect from me, and that galleries especially like to see a certain consistency in an artist's work.

I've been chafing under that yoke a bit: some part of me is eager to experiment, and restless about knowing it's the shoreline paintings that sell most predictably: I had felt like things were starting to get a little forced, that I was locked in to painting more intentionally rather than letting the creative spirit flow through me.

So it's amusing -- and very encouraging -- to discover I can do what I love and be totally loose about it and still arrive at place that's very consistent with my usual work. Woot!

... and this is why (she said, at her most Pollyanna-ish) I feel this time could be so productive for us all; that somehow we get more in touch with who we are and what we were born to do, with what flows most easily and successfully through us into the world. Maybe we'll lighten up, let go of all the shoulds that drive us, and become the people who see themselves as all part of a single body, each with a specific task; not competing, not acquiring, not trying to be something other than what we are, not demanding center stage...

But of course, it might have been a fluke. And isn't that the curse all creatives face? Even -- or especially -- confronted with our own success, we immediately start to wonder if it's a fluke; if we'll ever be able to pull off anything good ever again. Only now EVERYONE is dealing with that one: will we ever be able to have the life we had before the virus again? Only time will tell, and worrying about it won't help. We just need to keep plugging away and trust that what's meant to be will be. And now I'm hearing that wonderful Bebe Rexha song again... "If it's meant to be, it'll be -- baby just let it be."

Learnings: Again -- flip it on its side!
                   Let your brushstrokes show and be.